I refuse to be brow beaten by ten year olds.
“Hi Mom, how come you look so nice today?”
“I’m going out with my pals.”
“Where?”
“Over to Lisa’s for a cookery demonstration.”
“But you can cook already?”
“Yes I know, it’s just an excuse to…..get out and see my pals.”
“How comes yur dressed already? What time are ya goin?”
“Not until seven, but we have homework and therapy and chores and bread to make…. I mean……… there won’t be any other time for me to change.”
“Those are yur best jeans, you’ve not worn em for a long time.” I look at my daughter. I wonder what she’s building up to?
“Mom?”
“Yes dear?”
“Can Ann come over?” She puts her arm around Ann’s shoulder and they tilt their heads together for maximum appeal.
“No. I’m sorry. No play dates during homework days.”
“But you’ve gotta Mom!”
“No dear. We agreed.”
“But we gotta. It’s important!”
“I already spoke to her mother and Wednesday is inconvenient because it’s her Daddy’s birthday, remember?”
“Yeah, that’s why it’s sooooo important.”
“I don’t understand?”
“If she doesn’t come home with us, she’ll be all alone!” I pause. I recall that this is the pal with a vivid imagination.
“Nonsense. They’re all going out to celebrate his birthday.”
“No. She can’t go.”
“Why can’t she go?”
“Coz they’re going to the Elephant Bar and it’s no kids allowed.”
“We went there a few years ago. It’s not really a bar, more of a diner or restaurant.”
“It’s changed. No kids allowed.” This may or may not be true, I have no way of knowing as I dither on the sidewalk.
“I don’t understand. I’m sure it was a family celebration.”
“No kids Mom!”
“I…..well….er….. I’m not dragging the boys half way across the school to discuss it now. We’ll talk on the phone later and see what we can sort out. Now hurry up or the boys will be late for therapy.” True or not true, imagination or manipulation, I really don’t care at the moment.
“But she’ll be home all alone!”
“Yeah, my sisters goin out too and mom says I can’t stay home alone.”
“Oh. well…….if your mum phones me later and lets me know what time they’re going to the bar, then she can drop you off on the way. I can’t say fairer than that now can I?” I can compromise as well as the next genuinely spontaneous person.
“But they’re going right now!”
“Now?” Spontaneity just died. I have to many variables to juggle.
“Yeah they’re gonna be in the bar at 1:30!”
“Well……er…..”
“Great mom! Thanks! Come on, race ya to the car!”
All five of them stampede off. I wonder what time her mum will collect her? I hope it’s before 7?
My favourite commenter, Anon, is right, my children will never respect me. Just don’t call me a sucker, as that’s such a rude word.
6 hours ago
11 comments:
Dude, do you want me to kick anon's butt?
when you are juggling all those variables it really is hard to stand firm.
I often (more than anon would think appropriate I suspect) capitulate.
i want to go to the bar at 1:30. can I drop my kid off with you?
I hear ya. My kids are just now getting smart enough to blast through my excuses.
who the hell is this anon? you can put a setting on to stop anonymous comments you know. that would get shot of the anons of this world and leave more space for those of us with names...
I often give in to Patrick's brother. I know I shouldn't. I guess, for me, part of it is how unfair his life is sometimes and I just don't want to have to say no all the time to him (while running his brother around to therapy, school, etc.). Luckily, he's still a very good boy in spite of me I guess.
Oh, and can I drop mine off with painted maypole's kid?
Perhaps we should get together a lynch mob, go find this anon person, and teach him/her what-for. I can't stand people who hide behind their snarky comments by logging in as anon and I can't stand ones even more who think they are extremely knowledgeable on a subject and yet can't even come up with a fake name.
Whoever this anon moron is, you are a fine mother and I think your kids will more than respect you just as much or more than they love you.
So you capitulate every once in awhile, it's all part and parcel of being a parent and you show me one parent who has never done it and I'll show you a person who spent their entire childhood at military academy with parents who never gave him or her the time of day.
Whew - okay, rant over! For now!
So, what time did they finally come and pick her up? LOL
I'm a mean Mom... just ask my eldest... Give in... who me??
Luckily mine come home on the bus and the bus driver isn't allowed to let them off anywhere but home (for everyone - PITA when I want them dumped at my SIL's - 2 houses down the road).
I too want to know what time they came to pick her up at.
Anon - doesn't have kids nor a sense of humour.
Oh... and I'm going with the rest to the bar... my boys will be fine with yours :)
Sheri
You are a sucker, but so are most parents. If something is important enough you'll stand your ground. Obviously this wasn't.
Go with the flow... Anons are people that don't even believe in what they say...
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