Monday, August 27, 2007

Back to Oblivion please!


It is my burden in life to have surrounded myself with people who notice nothing. On the whole I can safely say that I could shave my head without anyone blinking an eyelid. With this in mind, I experience a surreal 24 hours, during which six different conversations give me pause for thought.

My dear pal in England via email
“I can’t believe that we’ve been friends for more than 40 years.”
“It hurts my brain to even think about it.”
“Even though I can’t see you, you've changed beyond recognition.”
“?”

Senior son -
“You are an ad…adu…….adul…….grown up?”
“Yes that’s right.”
“Me……I am….er….a teenager?”
“Not yet. When you reach 13 you’ll be a teen.”
“What am I being now?”
“A boy, a big boy.”
“What I will be in the…..future?”
“A man. Just like daddy.”
“I ….er fink maybe I will be just like you.”
“?”

9 year old daughter -
“Mom?”
“Yes dear.”
“Will I be as tall as you when I grow up?”
“Probably. All depends on which genes you had, the tall ones or the short ones. If you think about it, all the women in our family are short except for me.”
“But I'm nearly as tall as you already."

Spouse -
“By heck that’s a real corker! A real volcano!”
“Thank you dear!” [translation = pimple]

Junior son
“What they are?”
“What are what dear?”
“Doz pokey things?”
“What pokey things dear?”
“Doz pokey things on yur body…yur chest?”
“They’re chests dear.”

At the pharmacy [translation = chemist’s] -
“Wow Madeline you look great! [translation = vertical] Not seen you for ages, just yur hubby for yur medications, but geez you look different, you’ve put on so much weight!”

Now that is a compliment you don’t hear very often.

And in my other "life".........

8 comments:

Karen said...

Jenny used to call them "your nurses"--as in "when I grow up, I will have nurses too."

Hammer said...

You reminded me that I don't like to be complimented :)

The stuff your kids say is pretty entertaining :)

Jeni said...

Well, if he thinks when he grows up he will be just like you, I'd say he must have a good opinion then of what you do, who you are, etc. When I was a kid, I always used to say "When I grow up I'm not going to be like my mother." Yet, here I am now a grandmother and I became very much like my mother, often in the exact ways I swore I'd never delve into too, a long, long time ago!

dgibbs said...

Those are great!

mumkeepingsane said...

I love the "?".

Patrick is learning he/she, him/her, boy/girl. Anyway, he identifies everyone he meets, as well as all family members many times a day. The last time he told me I was a girl he asked me why I was a girl? I had no idea what to say to him. S'okay though, he figured it out. I'm the girl because I have the milk bottles!

Niksmom said...

Um, maybe the pharmacist thought you were too thin before? Really...

"Chests??" You crack me up, Maddy! And, tell Dad...shut up already about the pimple! "Bad spouse! Baaaaad Spouse!" Although I suppose it could have been worse...if spouse made the pharmacist's comment and vice versa...

Melissa said...

Was it "Tear down Maddy's self-esteem day??" You really took a beating!
Well, just so you know, I think you're fantastic!

tut-tut said...

Poor you!