Friday, August 31, 2007

Lawyer up

Nine months after jaw surgery I am in a dilemma.

It is at such times that I have a need to talk to my American pal who happens to be a lawyer, now that I am able to talk again.

“So how’s it all goin Maddy?”
“Oh, you know, on the mend.”
“Geez you sure are loud without all those wires. I can actually hear you and understand you for once.”
“Cheers!” I think?
“So what’s up? Are you in much pain now?”
“It’s all relative.”
“Right. How are the relatives?”
“Don’t distract me.”
“O.k. so how about you tell me what the problem is?”
“Well I’m just not sure what to do?”
“You know me, advice is free for friends.”
“I know but we’ve spent so much money already.”
“Insurance claims messin with your head?”
“I’m sure it will all sort itself out in the end.”
“Need to speed things up a bit? Cash flow?”
“Not so much.”
“Come on now. The legal business is the same whichever continent you’re on.”
“I hung up my metaphorical wig and gown when we first left England.”
“You’ve still got some fight in you. You’ve come this far.”
“I think my fight has fled.”
“Geez, what happened to the bravery awards?”
“Litigious is a relative term. I have other battles to fight.”
“You’re such a wuss.”
“I prefer wimp.” It a soft sound, less shrill.
“Well you know I’m here for you when you’re ready?”
“That’s why I’m calling.”
“You’re ready?”
“Sort of.”
“Cut to the chase.”
“Well, when I look in the mirror…..”
“Even I don’t do that early in the morning!”
“It’s all very peculiar.”
“What is? Your jaw, the teeth? Is your nose still numb?”
“Numb and tingling, very disconcerting. A bit like pins and needles.”
“I’m used to that.”
“Um. Do you remember when I called last time?””
“Sure. Back again?”
“Yes. Do you think it’s the same thing?”
“Yup. Furry?”
“Oh dear me yes.”
“Go to the doctor and get some antibiotics. It’ll be all cleared up in a few days.”
“Thank you. I’m so glad you were a nurse first.”
“Yeah, like working in the Intensive Care facility really qualified me to diagnose your furry tongue as Yeast Infection.”
“I prefer "Thrush.” A soft sound, but not Trill.

And in my other "life".......


Linda said...

What a trilling post! I didn't know you could get a yeast infection on your tongue ...

flutter said...

Oh thrush is the WORST. hope you feel better soon...

Niksmom said...

LOL abou the set-up...had me going there thinking you were going to sue someone! Thrush? UGH! Hope it goes away soon. A thought...have you tried a candida (yeast) cleansing program? I know, likeyou need another thing to do...but they work!

mumkeepingsane said...

I've never had thrush myself but Patrick's older brother had it as a baby...yuck.

I hope it clears up soon. We used gentian violet and everything was stained purple. :) Ahh, memories.

The Anti-Wife said...

You poor thing. Time for some happy healthy years for you!